Close to my Heart

1. This is an emotional post. For the weak-hearted, please skip this.
2. Many perceive that i am an easy going and friendly person; sometime i am wondering if i have adapted this perceive friendly image or i am born with it. Of course, as things change, people tends to change too.
3. It is at best for every parties if many things in life are not taken too seriously. We can laugh our way through some challenges, negative remark or even tragedy that we face or encounter. It required great wisdom and one need to be really wise to be able to achieve that.
4. For me, it is rather straight forward. It is very difficult to explain in words, not just about liking or loving someone; it seems that if that someone is so close and central in my heart, and hence, many things she does meant a lot to me. How she react, how she felt, what she wanted and what else could be better for her? 
5. Maybe you will tell me this is not healthy. We should not live for others, we should not build our life around someone else. It is difficult to strike a balance here, because deep down in my heart, she is important. And, life always has its way in getting into us. Until that one fine day, until that very moment, when she no longer need our caring; or maybe she had found that special someone who can share better with her, speak in tune with her, cook with her and in most of the aspect better than me; the whole world seems collapsed in an instance. Things became meaningless, joy is all lost and sense of giving up life as a whole (at a more exaggerate side).
6. What had happened ? and i start asking myself. Love doesn't and shouldn't change according to situation. Love transient space and time. That is true love. A conditional love is only an ego, a lust. Yes, we can jump up and say, we are not Saint, we are just a normal folk who love today and hate tomorrow and maybe love again the next day. Just go figure, Love should be like a sun beam, every shining in all angle. We love him or her as a whole, their good and bad, their everything. That suppose to be the true love.
7. If she is happier, if she can afford a better life and if she chose so; then we should celebrate with her but not agonize; after all, she who we love with all over heart deserve the best. 
8. And what about us ? what about me ? what is left for me ? No worries, nothing is lost but in fact, there is so much to gain. We learn how to appreciate a good relationship, we learn to appreciate good things from others, we learn to love ourselves, we learn about our negative (bad temper, controlling, childish) side and so that we can be a better version of us ( beta version perhaps).
9. Life is too short to feel too sad or too excited about, just try to leave no room for regret.