When 'Good Bye' Gone Eternal

Memory that once thought long forgotten resurfaced;
Feeling that once buried deep down reappeared.
It's amazing to see how things had changed, how fast it happened.
It's hard to imagine, even harder to accept certain incidents.
It feels like Déjà vu , but it's real;
It feels like a Dream, but it's real.

Tears was running down from time to time,
Perhaps the reserve is full, or maybe something triggers it.
For which GoodBye means eternal separation.
Hence the rain fall like never before,
It might be temporary, but it's for real;
It might be emotional, but it's for real.

Deep in memory trace, filled with fun, warm-hearted feeling and happiness,
Together with worries, sadness and rejection.
It's a process that we had been through, a path we had travelled.
Though the path might come into an end ;I pray for it's continuation,
Though it might mean nothing in the end; I still chose to preserve it.

Try my best to remember this White Christmas; every details & every feeling,
For it is white as the snow; as much as i try to hold but it never stays.
Try my best from thinking of you; your laughter & your smiles,
For it once was my sunshine; keeping me warm but i once got burnt.

Nothing is eternal, we are in the state of impermanence.
Dear God, do i stand a chance of exception?
To conserve what i wish; for as long as i want,
To own what i want; under your mercy and compassion.

Who can show me the lighted path; to where i should sail my boat?
Maybe only the compass in the heart knew;
Where the boat should sails and which port to dock;

Who can solve this messy puzzle; to where i should find the missing piece?
Maybe only the thinking box knew;
A bit of twist and turn the puzzle is solved, it's how i look at it, no missing piece.

i-banana in grive

KEMAN 12 - Framed in the Box called Memory

1. Due to the very happening and busy working schedule before and after the camp, i have to delay in writing my opinion and thoughts about the camp.
2. I was back in Peninsular on the 2nd December, reporting to office on 3rd December then went into the Jugra, Banting Camp site in the same night.
3. Preparation work is slightly messy i would say, but there's no harm done. I used to say," It's like that, there's the way it should and will be done." As long as the expectation is not too high, i don't think the camp will go very very wrong.
4. Friday morning is a nervy one as we were awaiting for the arrival of the students. This had reminded me of the feeling when i was a PM in UM awaiting for the freshies around the country for the orientation week.
5. All 7 courses went on smoothly, some had good reception from the floor, some are very boring. The one that had caught my attention discussed about chinese school, about blogger's right and also the environment awareness forum.
6. Is SRJK school a hindrace for national unity? The speaker, a chinese educationist, said it's not. A Fair and Just implimentation of government policy will be the one that responsible for national unity. He reminded us that, the reality where all of us can speak mandarin, read chinese and have chinese school, is not merely by chance. It was a result after many years of struggle, hard fought earned opportunity; for the chinese school will not have the same ending like english school in Malaysia. I very much appreciated that.
7. The session with Prof Azmi and Hishamuddin Rais was a fun one. Very frank and very truthful. I felt no matter who you want to complain or condemn BN or PR, we need a two party system in this country. For a fairer, equal and constructive ways in drafting and implimenting government policy. The rights of all Malaysians will then be taken care of; regardless of the colour, ethics and religion of the people of Malaysia for the better of the country.
8. The session that gave me the greater impact was the one discussing about the awareness on environment issues. The speaker told us that we are the most important generation in this era. I felt many don't understand what's the reason behind, they might thought because they are elite, smarter or more capable then generation before. Sadly, the reason behind it was, the time has come where we, the future generation have to do something to save the planet. Seawater level is ever increasing, global warming, the environment issue is in the hot seat. It's down to us, the "most important" generation of this era to really put things together and do something to conserve the environment.
9. Many undergraduates do not know how serious is the issue, each having their own agenda in life and no one actually have time to stop and think of these things. I am glad some of them had show concern and interest in it. Our aim of having this slots is to instill the awareness and sense of urgency among the undergraduate, i.e. the most improtant generation in this era. Let's work together to reduce, reuse and recycle our resources. First of all, start with no littering and save on electricity and water usage whenever possible. To reduce the usage, try reuse paper bags or bottle whenever possible and finally always recycle waste like paper, aluminium cans, and glass bottle. Be a civic minded citizen.
10. The aim of this camp is to provide a platform for students to interact. Maybe the camp fall short in this, as we do not have much time for students to carry out their own discussion. Personally i felt, this kind of sharing and discussion session will have more efficient and greater impact.
11. The camp was filled with tonnes of valuable information but we have less bonding session. We failed to create the atmosphere allowing students to make friend, to know more about each other, sharing different stories coming from various backgrounds. It's a waste of chance as we seldom have so many undergraduates all over the country that comes together in the camp but distance at heart.
12. Nevertheless, we had done quite well to a certain extend. I would say it's not too good but fair. As a committee member, i am proud to be part of the team. Each of us who have our very own commitment yet we still contribute to make this event a success. I was a bit envy of the facillitators, they actually make more friends and more impact on the students.
13. Hopefully the students find this camp informative and interesting. My wish is for them to have their own thinking and points, to think independently but with conscious and facts. Learn to look and analyze things from various angle and of course to walk the talk. Always remember, action speaks louder than words.

New Area, New Environment, New Experience but an Old Me

1. Had been travelling to Lahad Datu for work from 23rd Nov - 2nd Dec & 8th Dec - 15th Dec.
2. Long 18 days in Sabah, spending the days will different people from different backgrounds, most are wiser and more experience than me.
3. This opportunity given by my company had enable me to understand and get some trials on the way to become a project engineer.
4. My main job task is to supervise and monitor the progress of Wastewater Treatment Plant installation. Also, to buy the necessary enabling the work to go smoothly.
5. Of course as a first timer the challenge that lies ahead is to learn how to deal with the client on site, the workers and also to make good and fast decision. One needs to be observant , to be able to see those that had been overlooked, to be able to foreseen the intended progress or any possible obstacles (which an outcome needs to be configure out).
6. It's also similar with organizing activity in university where we need to do human management, time management and also resources management. The difference is this time it will not be a mere activity but we meant business here.
7. Lahad Datu town with a mix population of Malays, Philipines, Indons, local Pri-bumi and chinese. What that had suprised me was some part of the town and the social standard of the town reminds me a lot of Cambodia.
8. Children walking around in the town selling illegal cigarettes, cheap beer everywhere, littering is so much an unsinful act there. Of course prostitution and beggars are easily found everywhere.
9. I felt the federal and also state government has not done enough to improve the living standards of the people there. The state has been economically and politically exploited. So much so as the saying " the rich get richer the poors got poorer."
10. Illegal immigrants are a big issues in Sabah. Many family with 2-3 generation of people living in Sabah are non-citizens. What's that really sad is to see those offsprings of the illegal immigrants borned with no identity, no rights, and no protection.
11. A total solution should be made to grant this problem a good ending. These people made up a vital labour force for the palm oil industry in Sabah. The goverment should look into it seriously, not by chasing and sending them away, but work out to allow those who had settled here ages ago a citizenship, granting rights like other Malaysians do.
12. It's a good exposure for me to be able to stay there long enough to observe the people and condition there. We needs to improve, Federal should extend more aids to this state.
13. About my work, i felt i have so much more to learn and apply. To be really contributing to
    the company and fulfilling my wish to be more mature and proliferate with my work.
14. Back to KL, back to ground zero. Facing the daily chores, challenges and problems that are pending for solution. Nevertheless, this trip enable me to take a break from myself.
15. Rejuvenated & Refresh.
16. Old Me but with New Mind.