Covid Experience : Part 1 - The Incident

1. It was my 1 year anniversary working here in PH, and i started to fall ill with diarrheas and slight fever. Perhaps due to home sickness, or just loosing my guard and eventually i fall victim to the in-trend covid-19.
2. I felt something in my throat after my regular gym session on Tuesday （10th Aug). The next day it developed into sore throat and mild fever. I am expecting my immune body to fight and prevail this fight against the bacteria/virus as usual but this time i succumb to the illness after 1 week.
3. On Saturday i felt the sore throat and fever go worst, and so i went to the pharmacy to get some medicine, oxy meter, thermometer and also to the nearby stall to get some fruits. On the following Monday (16th Aug), i felt my situation getting worst and i had informed my superior and HR that i am not coming for work. The HR manager came to me and inform me that, in the case that i need to admit to hospital, i will need to do covid test and in the event i am tested positive, i will have to undergo quarantine for 2 weeks with no pay. It seems like a warning to me to not get treatment unless i willing to forego my pay.
4. I lost of my appetite and cannot sleep well in the night due to the fever and breathing difficulties. I am worry of the breathing difficulties as i had asthma when i was young. My fever is the worst on Tuesday night and on Wednesday i thought i felt better and went to the canteen to get some breakfast.
5. As i was sitting down on the table, my vision started to turn whiter and brighter. The longer i sat the worst it became. It was then i decide i need to start walking back to my dorm to rest. As i was walking to return the cup to the collection table, i can barely see the face of the people around me as everything is so white and bright. It was a blessing in disguise as when i was walking back to my dorm, with some motion, my vision started to improve and back to normal. I guess this is what happen when people starting to faint. I believe this is the signal that God had given me that, although my fever had subside, and my sense of smell had recover a little but everything is still not ok yet.
6. With some pressure and persuasion from my family, i had decided to alert the HR and Dorm assistant that i may need medical attention because i had difficulties in breathing. The nurse from the factory came, did some checking and informed that all my vital signs are ok. I insisted that i need to check on my lung as i had breathing difficulties. Nevertheless, they can only arrange to seek for medical attention the next day as it is already late in the afternoon.
7. The next day (Thu), i felt better as the fever had totally subside, and i am also hoping my body can recover slowly by itself (so that i do need to do covid testing, quarantine and loose my daily wage). Thus i had informed the dorm assistant that let's monitor one more day.
8. My sleep is not well over the past few days and on Friday afternoon after watching youtube of uncle 

Injuring Oneself

1) It was a usual lazy Sunday afternoon which i decided to walk out to the main street to get some coconut to chill myself up. On my way back, a mis-step and i fall down on all four where my right knee was bruised and bleeding. 

2)  Its been quite some time since the last time i fall down and injuring myself. The sensation of pain, swollen knee, the wound and blood suddenly make me very alive. A sense of "Now" felt deep within me. I know some people might think i am psychopath at this point, but believe me, i just like to overthink things, that is just me.

3) Almost 8 months i am here in The Philippines. It was the longest time in my life till date that i have not met up with my family and friends. Of course at times i will be moody, i felt all alone and helpless nevertheless the 10 years i spent in Penang had definitely helped me in facing this challenge. Summing up in one word, just don't think about it.

4) I remembered the first few years when i was in Penang in year 2010, i spent quite a few Sunday night in one of the internet cafe in Chai Leng Park, checking mail, feeling myself and writing blog. Since these few years, i have not been updating blog that often. The whole purpose of maintaining a blog is to express and record my feeling and my life journey and it all stated in 2009.

5) Often times i will have some complain about the life "now", and often times i will be worried about the future, what is my life is like in the future after this phase in the PH. Worrying the future, and not living in the "Now" enough is often the mistake i made. The fall this afternoon, the wound and the pain sensation just helped to remind me again, to live the "Now".

6) With all those years spent in Penang and growing wiser in the process, i knew all too well the importance and the power of now. Just sometime i will fall back, drown in the sea of overthinking, over worrying. Nevertheless, i am glad that i can kept the consciousness and alert enough every time to keep things in check. This bleeding knee just came in a time to remind me, time is limited, cherish what we have and given.

7) Many people asked about how am i here, i often answered work is fine just life with no family and friends is a bit stressful. Indeed that is what i can summed up here. Nothing much i can do here as the Covid cases are still looming large around the world. I just kept telling myself, time will come for me to reunite with my loved one. I am here now to make me realized and learn about the importance of family and friends to me. Teaching me to cherish and appreciate life as it is. Hence, worry no more, just enjoy and appreciate life as it is.

8) With the cases in PH climbing to the region of 7k cases per day, let's pray that everyone can be safe and sound, keep their guard up. Adapting and learning the solitary life here again at different level. Nevertheless, thank god there is internet and video call at my time. Just can't imagine how earlier people kept in touch using letters. Again, i must cherish it.

My Four Legged Friend

1) Perhaps God knew that I am all lonely here. Two kittens appeared near our dorm 1.5 month ago. One black and one white.  They came back for food a few times and I started to be friend with them.

2) In my Uni days I really don't like cat as I think that they are not as loyal as dog, always wearing their cold look. As these kittens were so cute, can't help myself to buy some cat food to feed them. 

3) The black kitten was smaller in size and weaker. Didn't show up after two times, the white one was stronger and bigger in size. She will meow In front of my doorstep daily after I come home for food. Initially I only feed her in front of my doorstep and didn't allow her to come in worrying that she will pee or shit in my room. 

4) Some how after 2 weeks or so I allow her to play in my room. She will rub her body over my leg and giving out very soft meow asking for food. After the food she will treat my room as her play ground running here and there, playing with the strings, the phone Cable , the curtain , hide under my bed to scare me, trying to play with me, and curl herself into my leg when I am sitting on the floor. 

5) Normally after her meal and letting her to play in my room for a while,I will let her out of my room. Normally she will wait outside at the walkway near the toilet till the next morning for the next feeding before I leave for work. 

6) It went on for a good 2-3 weeks then until she started to give problem to other housemate as she is going into the rooms of others and shit in their room. She even got lock into their rooms three times as she quietly slip into the room and was locked inside as the guys went to work without noticing it. I was worrying about her and slip food under the room for her. 

7) We can't imagine how terrible is the room when the owner finally came back and found out the room is in a mess with faulty smell as she shit on their bed. These got many people started to be furious at her and I get warned to not feed her in room. 

8) Out of no choice I feed her at the door step of our dorm main door, I have to chase her out of our dorm for the better of others. Only in the morning she will still come meowing at my doorsteps for food. 

9) As I thought this method of feeding is ok, for at least I still can feed her and she can start to mix more with other cats around the neighborhood; a tragedy happened few days ago. 

10) The day before yesterday was a non working Saturday and she came to my room in the morning for food. After push the food out at my doorstep, I continue to sleep a while and prepare myself to bath and breakfast. After around 1 hour, as I was walk out the dorm main door. I was shocked and speechless to see her in a pool of blood, she was wounded at the head and was dead. 

11) I was so sad and shocked and I couldn't react. I just picked her up and put her into s rubbish bag and put her into the dustbin. I didn't thought of burying her, I just wish to clear her body to avoid been further damage by other cars , cats or dogs. 

12) I wonder what killed her, most likely by another cats as I heard her leaving my room and some at fighting sound near the main road. I don't think it was car that hit her and I choose to not believe that any human will kill such a small kitten.

13) Sadness loomed in me, I cried a few times as I recalled her roaming in my room. I miss her dearly as she will follow me if I am goin to toilet or goin to refill my water bottle. I miss her rubbing her body over my leg, I miss her playing with me. She is my only close 'friend' here I wonder why God brought her to me and taken her away so soon.

14) I appreciate the happiness she brought to me over the pass 1.5 month. She thought me all about love, care, responsibility. Taking care a cat is also a a huge responsibility as it was also a matter of another life, another living creature with love. I knew nothing I can do to bring her back to life. It is only memory now that she has left for me. 

15) Again, she use her short life to remind me about the uncertainty in life, to not take things for granted, to appreciate all the good and bad things happening in my life for nothing is permanent. We live only once and live it to fullness. Thanks Xiao Bai for the joy and memory you brought to me. 

Sunday Reflection

1) It's been a week ago since I finally started my work here, my new chapter, my new journey. It was kind of blessing where I am given enough break in between, to ease my adaptAtion to the new environment.  

2) I reported to work on 14th Aug (Friday), and it was a working Saturday that week. And following week after continuos 4 days of working, it was a long weekends with a public holiday on Friday and follow by a non-working Saturday. I managed to get my self some good rest, explore the nearby neighborhood a little, and now I am in this cafe delipa the second time. 

3) Enjoying a cup of hot chocolate while watching RunningMan. And now is the time for some blogging. Over the past week, I think the most challenging part is the way how the work squishes every inch of life left on me. It maybe a bit of exaggeration, but that is the honest feeling. 

4) Everyday I need to wake up at 5am and get myself ready by 6am to catch the bus towork, and the day only end with a bus ride back to dormitory at 720pm. Owing to the jam, normally I am back to my room around 820-840pm. Not to mention also the fight for water to bath during the peak time. It was a horrible 14 hours taken up willingly or unwillingly with so little left. 

5) I knew very well human can adapt pretty well, eventually. I always save two pail of water in my room for bathing, I try to be productive in my daily 2 hours bus commute by watching YouTube, listening to audiobook and coming weeks onwards, I had downloaded some podcast before hand to counter the horrible internet speed here. I had met a few Malaysians who were here for almost three years and the three of them is "graduating" in next month and returning to Malaysia for good. It reminds me about a similar feelings when the senior who finished their STPM came back to take their result. I was there the new chap just enrolled into the monstrous STPM and wondering when my time will come.

6) This whole episode also reminded me about the period when I just entered UM. I really had a hard time adapting to the Uni life despite my Form 6 school is just across the street of UM'S PJ gate. Turnout after three years, that was one of the highlights in my life which i truly enjoyed. 

7) I believe and and kept reminding myself I shall be fine. I should be able to brace through this changes and life challenges here. I wish to summarize a few points here to give some positive vibes as well as  to stir myself clearer and as a kind reminder to myself. 

8) Firstly, the customers, the workload, the colleague and the superior; the industry know-how; I have strong confidence that I am able to handle it pretty well, in fact I may not need to dig very deep into my experience to handle it. Yet, I still need to put in extra effort and attention in this work as I am not here for mediocrity, or just meeting the expectation given by the company.

9) Secondly, on the work environment. As mentioned, the extensive working hours truly drains into my life. Nevertheless, to put it into context, I should stop comparing, and complaining. It is all the same old stories, we cannot control what life throws at us, but as usual, as what I had done before, take charge, adapt and make full use of it. With accommodation, laundry service, food, transportation all covered, what else can I asked for? Comparing to the suffering my parents had endured to raise me up, this is truly not worth even to mention or bring up. Over the weekends, I took my chances and walk about the neighborhood. Looking at the environment where people of less fortunate need to endure a lot of hardship to make a living, I believe I am at least 10X-20X better off from where I am now. I am not allowed or even forbidden to complain if any. Everyone is giving their level best to earn a living and I should not give my excuses. I am here not to enjoy life; remembered my primary aim here? To gain experience and increase exposure to work in international organization at a different scale, and working abroad. My timeline ? 1-2 year. That's it. Crystal!!!

10)Thirdly, routine life is bored but the different side of the coin is it gave me a better control on my life. I need to plan ahead what I wanted to achieve 1-2 years down the road. How I can improve myself and my future planning? 

11) In this particular chapter of my life, I believe it gave me a new opportunity to review and renew my life as I know too well, such period of solitude normally is the time for me to concentrate and improve myself. 

Hello 2020

1) It was a great surprise that my old faithful iPad mini 1 with the apps blogger still up and running in year 2020 after a good 6 years or so. 

2) Yes after such a long pause since I last updated here, two years had passed. It is my original aim for the creation of this blog to record my story, my growth, my thoughts and opinion. A great amount of courage and honesty is necessary to carry out personal reflection and record here. 

3) I'll be honest here to recollect what happened during the period of Not Updating Blog first. To address the elephant, Firstly; After the very trip to AUS, I had gotten the answer I needed. There is a long road to recovery and further soul-searching. Of course subconsciously I might had knew the outcome long before but that very moment is very important to discover the truth, to acknowledge the reality. 

4) I'm glad to be blessed with very good bunch of friends to help me through. In fact, I guess God has been really kind in his way to bless me with a cute, understanding, opinionated in her way, someone who indeed care and love me all equally. After a long indecisive period and finally with all the courage gathered I had confessed in a trip to Pangkor with her on Dec'19. Everything else then is history. During the whole process, many things had changed and one will know how great the magnitude is if I tell you that I am now a Vegetarian and I am now an Yi-Kuan-Dao follower. 

5) I have always knew that my job at TXPG will only be a stop-over point. I am not fully satisfied with the work there as the change of management and management decision is very fluid and uncertain. Having said that, I had grab the opportunities provided by my job role there with both hand; to explore into a variety of industry ( Semiconductor, HVAC, MLS, Aerospace) as well as thermoforming technology. These had further equipped me with more knowledge and industry know-how. 

6) It was a twist of fate if you ask me. I am now blogging in my dormitory at the Philippines. By chance I was given the opportunity to join a multinational EMS companies and the my 10 years experience in this industry should be very handy in my project management role here. 

7) It was rather challenging period for me to join a new job. Owing to the Covid-19 pandemic, the worldwide lockdown and international travel restriction had caused me to be frictionally unemployed for around 4 months. I'm now servicing my 14 days quarantine at hostel before I can start my new role here. 

8) Despite of the worries on loss of income and the withdrawal of the job offer; I am glad that the four months are put into good use. I had spend 2 months to dine at my gf place at night, to get to know her, her family, lifestyle and exchange of our values which enhances our understanding of each other. Another 2 months I had spent with my family. I guess it is not likely for me to stay with parents for two months if I am not out of Job. The last time I spend so much time at home with my parents will be around 15-16 years ago when I attended Form 6 and 2 years after I graduated before moving to Penang. I cherished every moment I spent with her and my family. As I aged, my priorities changed and family seems more important to me now. 

9) Having said that, my decision to leave home and work afar seems contradicting. There are a few reasons for my decision. With 10 years of industrial experience, I think this job offer is a great opportunity for me to move up another level; from a privately owned company to the Malaysia listed company and finally to the MNC. It will provide me with even more exposure, learning curve as well as opportunity to perform. It was also my dream to work/ study overseas and this job offer helps me to achieve it. Also, with hostel, meals and transport provided this will be a good opportunity for me to earn and save some money for my future family planning. All in all, I thought it was a correct move for now. 

10) I knew it will not be a bed of roses here. I have to stay true to my aim and the targets that I wish to achieve here. Stay focus and professional. I miss my family, I miss her and I miss my home country.  It will be only temporary before I can reunite with them. Let's stay focus, and perform to achieve the target which I had set here. 

End Note: A very condensed version of my last two years journey and my next destination. Hopefully more to come.